I have last night! We did a group massage thing. Seven of us, 2 massage tables and oceans of bliss. The thing I am really enjoying is that the bliss is still with me today to the point that I am writing the post, the first time I’ve blogged for months.
Sexual experience is so intimately connected to our sensuality but I think that in a busy world, where lives are moving fast, we often lose sight of our bodies aside from a quick bonk when the time is right (and its Business Time)  . Sometimes it can be hard to let boundaries go and explore, it’s just not a big part of ‘western’ culture. In fact we’re culturally programmed to be suspicious of sensuality. When I was first invited to a group massage experience I was vaguely creeped out! Was this going to be some kind of weird cult-ish experience? So it was with a sense of mild curiosity and the hope that I wouldn’t scream ‘get your hands off me’ and stomp off that I entered the room.
I didn’t freak out and the first experience was interesting in a weird kind of way. I walked into a room of about 20 people I didn’t know, candles glowing, heaters blowing, it was warm and friendly right from the start. People of different ages, sizes and shapes all together in one room with the purpose of getting naked and massaging eachother. We sat around and introduced ourselves and talked about what the group was: a few people getting together once a month to practice sensual (not sexual) massage. People said what they wanted and the rules where agreed upon. Sensual rather than hard massage strokes, ‘my breasts are part of my body but I don’t want to be sexually stimulated’, ‘if you get a hard on it’s not a problem’,’ if you brush sexual organs inadvertently just carry on’, and so on. We had about 20 minute sessions each. 3 people got on massage tables and the rest of us took turns massaging them. After about the second person when I had relaxed I got into this really cool head space. It was one of those moments when I felt like I learned something but not in words so putting it in words is also difficult. But there is something about several people giving you their energy and about you working with a few people to give someone else a blissful experience that feels good for the soul. I slept like a baby that night.
I slept like a baby again last night and had amazing sex this morning and I’ve been blissed all day since. In my experience of being part of the other group it just gets better as the energy builds, the expectations come into line and everyone gets comfortable. I’m looking forward to more of the same.
Has anyone else had interesting sensual experiences?
Dr Michelle Mars is a free lance sexologist living in Sydney. She can be contacted on +614000 82936or firstname.lastname@example.org